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It is disturbing and frightening that psychopaths share so many traits with the popular notion of a "perfect" man, as I painfully discovered.

But the good news is that there are always red flags.

This is called the “pity play” and, according to Martha Stout, author of the Sociopath Next Door, it’s potentially the single biggest red flag.

In her book, Stout writes that if “you find yourself often pitying someone who consistently hurts you or other people, and who actively campaigns for your sympathy, the chances are close to 100% that you are dealing with a sociopath.” Is your partner's past somewhat murky?

I’m confident about being trans, and my philosophy about dating as a trans woman is I bring up my trans status as soon as possible.

And sometimes it will be as simple as mentioning, ‘Oh I just got off a Lifeline call.’ Because I was a volunteer coordinator for them.

Of course, these individuals don’t speak for entire demographics, but they do provide some insight into the nuances of the very human search for love and connection. I was in medical school two years ago, but because of an administration that was hostile to my transition, that kind of fell by the wayside.

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This feels amazing, so of course you want it to be normal. Two non-psychopathic human beings will, once in a while, disagree and even fight. Because it's natural to have different opinions, emotions, likes, and dislikes. RELATED: 10 Subtle Signs of Bipolar Disorder Has your boo had the worst luck?

Did your affair start out as an emotional rollercoaster, hot and heavy with a tinge of danger?

Did the danger have to do with some form of competition?

The excessive flattery and compliments play on your deepest vanities and insecurities—qualities you likely don’t even know you possess." We want the fantasy to be true, so we ignore that tiny warning voice in our heads.

But fast and furious is not a real way to get to know someone.

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